Chore Charts

What a drag, right?  Seems like the chore chart becomes a chore for mom - and I don't need any more of those!

I was looking for something that was more work for the kids than for me.  Something that they would have to be in charge of themselves.  Teach a little responsibility, but keep it tactile enough for them to be successful.  Am I the only mom that shudders at the thought of my 3 year old with a marker checking off her chores?  Stickers?  Much more than the chart would be decorated!  

So here's what I came up with after scrolling through the internet FOREVER.  It's a compilation of ideas - and as yet untested since it went on the wall yesterday.  And - my 4 year old is testing her limits with said chores.  But she's testing everything so why should this be any different?  :)

First I thought of the jobs that they already do, but that I have to remind them of (remember, the goal is to help me get off their cases - I will add more responsibilities if this thing works.).  On my computer I made a template for the "chore card," then, I found cute icons of the chores for my non-readers, and then added a character for each kid.  Stephen has the Millenium falcon, Clara has Belle, and Abbie has Cinderella.  My goal here was two-fold - 1.  Get them a little excited about their little card, 2.  Eliminate some creative job sharing.  Mama's no fool.  

Then each chore was taped to either yellow or green cardstock.  Yellow for morning chores, Green for afternoon/evening.  Each card was laminated, then I used the free tools at Archivers to punch holes in the cards and cut them to the right size.  

I purchased these simple wood hangers with 4 knobs from Ikea for $2.  Painted each with leftover paint from around the house, and bought letters for 1/2 off at Michaels.  

On a side note, I also purchased these wood hangers for two of our bathrooms.  I put button-holes in 4 kid washcloths and hung them on each knob.  The kids use the washcloths like hand towels.  They each have one and it has really cut down on the viruses that we share!

And here it is!  A little ribbon from around the house, leather shoe-lace for Stephen, and some hot-glue to put it together.  The chore hangs on the left side until they complete it - then they move it to the right side.  In the morning they work until they get to the green cards.  

My absolute favorite chore was a little surprise to me.  As I was working at Archivers, I had a little light-bulb moment.  I made Stephen and Clara both a card called "Ask".  When they get to that card, they come find me, tell me what they've done for the morning/afternoon, and ask if there's anything else I need help with.  Oh yeah, this is definitely my favorite card.  

I'm pretty happy with how it looks and hopefully it works.  Stephen had his done by 7:30 this morning.  I doubt the enthusiasm will last, but it was worth one stress free morning!  

Catching Up

I unloaded the photo card the other day and realized how behind I am!  Here's some of the last month (or two!)

Stephen's Birthday Party

Fun at the Twins Game!

Fun at Lebanon Hills

with friends and dad.

Trying out the two-wheelers

Stephen was successful ...

the girls will try again next year!

Our State Fair is a great State Fair!

Last summer Hurrah

at Lake Harriet!

Mr. Bob

A very dear man from our church passed away early Friday morning.  His struggle with cancer was a long and difficult one.  He had lost almost complete function of his arms and legs, and gained excruciating pain.  

Their family has 5 children, the youngest is just about Stephen's age.  Mr. Bob would volunteer during the Wednesday night program in his daughters class - which is how Stephen came to know Mr. Bob.  Bob came as long as he was physically able and loved the kids.  Even when he was in his motorized wheelchair, he was there.  And Stephen grew to love Mr. Bob.

When I heard Friday morning about Bob's death, I knew that God would have to guide Brian and I in our conversation with Stephen.  This is a kid who cried when a character in "Adventures in Odyssey" died.  It was going to rock his little world.

Friday night I prayed.  I begged for guidance, and fell asleep knowing that the God who loves my kids more than I do would provide.  Around 4 am on Saturday I woke up to Abbie crying.  As I covered her up and checked on the other two, I suddenly just knew how I was going to talk to Stephen.  God is so good to me, and so sweet to my kids.  I love that.

As Brian flipped pancakes Saturday morning and we sat around the table, I pulled out 5 big rectangular pieces of paper and a box of crayons.  I wrote Stephen's name on the top of the first one (in the requested green crayon), and drew a large oval.  In the circle we wrote words that described Stephen as a person.  "Kind."  "Fun."  "Smart."  "Loves to be first."  We did this for each of the family members.  There was a slight skirmish over the purple crayon - but other than that the kids loved the exercise.  

At the end, I held up my circle.  

"Who is this circle?"  I asked.  

"Mom!"  They replied.  

"That's right!  This is called my soul.  It's who I am."  

 ~ insert conversation on which letter soul starts with, how it's spelled, what their sheets of paper say, and how Abbie possibly has the most syrup ever. ~

"Souls live in bodies.  Sometimes bodies die, and if that person loves Jesus, they get to go to heaven and get a new body!"

As I spoke, I held the picture in front of me, then moved it up into the air.

"I love Jesus!"  Stephen exclaims - with thoughts of a new super baseball player body, I'm sure. 

Now to the hard part ...

"Mr. Bob went to heaven to get his new body on Friday.  He might even be running around in heaven right now without his wheelchair!"

"Really?"  Stephen asked.

"Yup."  

"His body here is empty now.  And that's kind of sad because we won't get to see him again until we get to heaven,"  Brian said.

At this, Stephen seemed to understand the finality of Bob's death.  His face got so sad.  It truly breaks a parents heart to see their child mourn.  I opened my arms, and with big sobs Stephen poured out his heart, first to me, then to Brian.  We held him and cried with him.  

On Wednesday morning we'll go to the memorial service for Bob.  I'm sure we'll have to get there early as it will be packed.  Bob truly was an amazing man who touched many.  His service is planned to be a celebration of the gifts he received in his life and of the God he loved so much.  I'd like to ask for your prayers as we show Stephen his first memorial service and will surely have more questions to answer.  

You don't have a soul.  You are a soul.  You have a body.

                   - C.S. Lewis

First Day of Kindergarten!

I am so not ready for this.  Maybe I'm just not ready for the line up of kids heading off to school.  A friend recently told me that the days are long but the years are short.  It's a sad thing to know in my heart.

Me (to Stephen):  Wow.  I don't know, Stephen.  All this is happening so fast.  Are you really ready for kindergarten?

Stephen:  Maaahhoommm.  You know I'm ready.

Brian:  Sure he's ready.  Stephen do you know how to sit in the right spot at school?

Stephen:  Oh yeah, and I can even find my name at a table.  I can also find my locker.

Brian:  Good!  What would you do if you need to go to the bathroom?

Stephen:  Oh, that's easy.  I'll just raise my hand, and say 'can I go to the bathroom, please?'

Brian:  Great!  See mom, I think he's ready for Kindergarten.

Me:  OK.  I guess HE's ready - but there's no way I'm ready.  Who will be my buddy in the afternoon?  I'm going to miss you so much, Stephen, when you're gone.

Stephen:  Oh, mom.  It's just 3 hours.  I'll be home every night - and I'll even stay home all day for two days.  

He stopped to think a minute.  Somehow he wanted to ensure that I would be alright.

Stephen (looking at his sisters):  Girls, you'll just have to be as much fun as I am when I'm gone.  

Clara was doubtful, Abbie began to internally scheme, and I'm realizing that my baby isn't a baby.  Gosh, I love that boy.

Olympic Confussion

Abbie watching olympic  basketball:

"Umm, mom.  Those guys are NOT sharing."

In the car, explaining to Stephen where India is:

"Oh yeah, I know those guys.  They're in Cleveland.  The Cleveland Indians."

Then later, after more explaining ...

Stephen:  "So... is it where dad was last weekend?"

Me:  "No honey, that's Indiana."

The other day we were convicted that we aren't telling the girls how smart they are.  A conversation with Clara ...

Me:  "Clara, you are so - "

Clara:  " - cute."

Me:  "Well yes, but I was going to say smart.  I think you're really a smart girl."

Clara:  "Oh.  Well.  I know that I'm smart."

Me:  "How's that?"

Clara:  "Well, when Abbie is mad at me, I can figure out why."

Blessed

At our church annual meeting, the worship pastor asked about songs that are meaningful to us. He said he noticed that the church seemed especially responsive to the song "Blessed be the Name of the Lord."

Am I that transparent when singing?

Clara's birth and infancy was a stressful time for our family. Her labor was 3 days (no, I'm not exaggerating), Stephen was still a baby himself at 21 months, and Brian was in a dead sprint towards the finish of his Masters project. Clara was a great nurser, yet wasn't gaining any weight. At her 4 week appointment she was still less that 6 lbs - nearly the same as her birth weight. Looking back I also was probably facing some post-partum issues and directing most of my hormonal energy at poor Brian. Our house was messy, smelly, loud, and tension charged.

Enter - positive pregnancy test. Two babies in one year.

Brian heard my sobs from the kitchen and came around the corner. He lifted me from the floor, comforted me through his own shock, and left for work.

After a few deep breaths, I turned on the radio for a distraction. At that same moment, Brian turned on his in his car.

"He gives and takes away,
He gives and takes away,
My heart will choose to say,
Lord, blessed be your name."

It became my mantra. "He gives and takes away... my heart will choose to say." With one hand He was giving us an unexpected baby, with the other He was taking away our plans.


Then came the request to move to the other side of the world. Only 6 months, but 6 very big months in the lives of our little family. We would have a 2 year old, a 4 month old, and eventually give birth in Tokyo. Brian was given warnings of an intense work schedule.

"Blessed be your name
On the road marked with suffering
Though there's pain in the offering
Blessed be your name."

We accepted in faith - and even excitement. (What can I say - we're a little nuts.) And He provided. And provided. And provided. We were allowed a nanny. For the first time ever, we didn't have any money worries and were able to save enough to purchase a van outright when we came home. Everyone was healthy. Brian's job was even strangely quiet during our 6 months.

"Blessed be your name
when the sun's shining down on me
when the worlds all as it should be
Blessed be your name."

I wish I was a quick learner. I wish I could say that I learned some great lessons while we were in Tokyo. That I had the perspective to see (as Sarah Groves says) that God was recycling my trials to bring me gain. That He was providing us abundantly to show that He can. That He is reliable. Dependable. Loving. Protective.

No. I didn't really get it. I had a glimpse. An inkling. To be honest, I was mostly just surviving through that time and working hard to make it through the day without a cultural disaster.

But now - when I hear that song. When I sing over and over...

"Every blessing you pour out
I'll turn back to praise.
When the darkness closes in Lord
still I'm gonna say -
Blessed be the name of the Lord."

I learn something new. Each and every time, He shows me something new. Photos flash through my mind. Things that I didn't - couldn't - see. Perspective.

What a wonderful gracious God to continuously remind me of His love. To let me remember that he is My Rock and My Redeemer.



And I praise, and praise, and praise.

"Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be your name, Jesus.
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be your glorious name."

Thinking ...

A book I like to pick up every now and then is "A Man Called Peter", by Catherine Marshall (who also wrote Christy and Julie).  Anyway, it's a wonderful story of a Scottish preacher whose style and personality reformed the way many thought a church service should look in the 30's and 40's.  I love his perspective and his sense of humor.  It's a great biography of his life in ministry as well as with his family.

Anyway, at the end of the book are a few of his sermons.  Yesterday I picked up the book and skimmed one - and just can't stop thinking about a concept he talked about in a sermon called "Go Down Death".  (it's a long quote - but he writes beautifully.  I only wish I could hear it in his Scottish brough!)

Life begins at conception.

When that happens, two microscopic germs of life unite and become one - and a new man has begun the first stages of his existence.

In that living atom, there is in miniature every quality and capacity of the grown man - 

his sex and size

the color of his hair and eyes

his temperament and intellectual ability

his own individual talent

and, in large measure, his character and destiny.  

Now this first stage of life is purely physical.

It is a life lived in darkness, devoted wholly to the business of growing and preparing for the life to come.

 ...

The fact that these qualities are present and not used in this first stage of life is evidence that another kind of life will follow.

In due time, the child dies to the first stage of his life and is born into the second.  

...

There is little immediate change in him.

He is born into the second form of life, but he makes a great gain.

He sees the light - is fascinated by it

follows it

blinks at it ...

His senses awaken and he can feel.

He can hear.

He can smell.

He is conscious of existence.  

Soon he can move about and begins to discover and understand and enjoy the wonder world of his second life.

Now this second life is physical like the first - but it gives him a new capacity.

He can think.

For many years, he can enjoy an intellectual life

reasoning

planning

reflecting

learning

using knowledge to build up wisdom

making deductions

arriving at conclusions.

What then?

Does he wear out, and die, and live not more?

In this second form of life, as in the first, he develops capacities not required by his present existence.

In this present life, he needs no more than other animals.  Are his highter qualities developed simply for the grave?

He dreams beyond his reach.

There is planted within him a deep longing for a golden tomorow when there shall be no more pain

nor crying

nor sorrow

nor death

nor parting any more

...

Something within us aspires to another life.

There is an intuitive longing - why?

Where did it come from?

Who planted it there?

Why do we doubt that we shall be born into a third form of life when we die to this one?

And why do we doubt that a kindly Nature, 

or shall I not rather say a loving Father in Heaven,

will make that second birth as easy and as gainful as the first?

Wow.  I'm really struck by this and am chewing on it.  

Somehow I've always had the thought that heaven would be ... well, boring.  But if a baby in utero thought that life would perhaps be boring - how terribly mistaken!  I'll have to keep mulling over this one.